Confessions Of Citigroup's Robert Rubin

This past Saturdays edition of The Wall Street Journal had an interview with Citigroup's Senior Advisor and Board member Robert Rubin. I obtained an unredacted copy of the interview from a non-Jewish staff member.

WSJ: Good morning Mr.Rubin.

Rubin: My coffee and bagel are cold. Can you freshen them up?

WSJ: Certainly. Can I call you Bob?

Rubin: For now.

WSJ: Since 1999, when you were brought on board at Citigroup by former CEO Sandy Weill, you have pocketed over $200 million in salaries and stock options. During that same time Citigroup's stock has lost over 90% of its value and now teeters on bankruptcy.

Rubin: So?

WSJ: Don't you feel any guilt? Weren't you overpaid when all things are considered?

Rubin: Hey, nobody saw this problem coming.

WSJ: Exactly. That's my point. You got over $200 million in compensation but still classify yourself with all the other "nobodys"that didn't see the financial meltdown coming. So where's the value-added from you ?

Rubin: Are you anti-semitic?

WSJ: No. Actually I'm a Jew but not a filthy Jew.

Rubin: What do you mean by that?

WSJ: Isn't it true that Sandy Weill enlisted your help to drive out of office his non-Jewish, co-Chair and 16 year veteran John Reed in 2000?

Rubin: Reed had thin skin. He had a thing about morals and cleanliness. He was a pushover.

WSJ: How did you help Weill get rid of this responsible man?

Rubin: Well off the record. When morals get in the way of money-making, morals go bye-bye. Anyway back to your question, during the week I would have a butt outside and wait for Reed's limo to pull up. Then I would call Sandy on the cell for the tricks da jour.

WSJ: And?

Rubin: Sometimes Weill would rush to Reeds privy and make a mess and not clean up. Or many times he would replace Reeds wife picture with Sandy's own wifes picture. She looks like Sandy in drag. She makes Greenspan's wife Andrea "Shrink Wrap" Mitchell look like Greta by comparison.

WSJ: Anything else?

Rubin: Yea , I think the last straw was when Reed got a solicitation for a discounted Jewish High- Holidays dog circumcision that was refered to him by Sandy himself . Hey where's my coffee and bagel?

WSJ: Hey Bob, go fuck yourself.

Another Banking & Brokers Crisis: Can't Learn If Can't Remember.

In 1999 during Clinton's tenure of office The Glass-Steagal Act (a.k.a. Banking Act of 1935) was repealed by the republican controlled Congress . The repeal was pushed by Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan and Citigroup's Chairman Sandy Weil, Secretary Of Treasury Robert Rubin who left government after Glass-Steagall repeal and joined Citigroup and Bill Clinton. The repeal let banks back into the brokerage business. Let Citigroup back into the securities business is an understatement. It was Citigroup's Smith Barney's unit that was part of the fraud at Worldcom that cost investors $ 150 billion in losses. It seems that Sandy and Robert and Smith Barney anaylist Jack Grubman just can't play it straight. The three should have gone to prison.

Banks by nature should be safe and secure. Brokers by nature are anything but safe and secure.Citigroups stock since reentering the brokerage and related security dealings has plunged from $56.00 per share to $19.00. Today Bear Stearns collapsed from a 14 month high of $170.00 per share and was acquired by JP Morgan Chase for $ 2.00 per share. Hello? Anyone remember why the depression-era banking reform legislation happened? What was dumb and risky for the banks in the 1920's and 1930's is still dumb and risky.

Also " Character is fate", acording to the 6th century B.C. Greek philosopher Heraclitus. That hasn't changed either.